Staff Picks
Bible Stories in 60 Seconds: 240-258-4010
Call 240-258-4010 for a modern take on the creation story.
Circular ReDirect Hotline: 973-409-3469
Ever call a number to find out its been changed? Ever call the new number just to find out its been changed back to the original? Try our Circular ...
Employment Hotline: 678-554-1083
Recession hit you hard? Take a tip from our "Employment Hotline": 678-554-1083.
Mind Reader Hotline: 781-452-0841
Want to have your mind blown? Well, will you settle for having it read? Call the Mind Reader Hotline and be amazed!
New Year's Resolution Rant: 786-837-9926
Know someone that has trouble sticking to New Year's Resolutions? Have them call 786-837-9926 for a New Year''s Resolution Rant by the Pissed-Off ...
Outsource-A-Breakup To India: 631-403-2029
Have our good friend Prakash help with your next breakup. Just have your former special someone call 631-403-2029, or call yourself for a ...
Outsource-A-Friendship To India: 267-436-5128
Need a friend? Call 267-436-5128 to hear from someone who can help.
Psychiatric Hotline: 973-409-3277
Obsessive-compulsive? Multiple Personality Disorder? Nymphomaniac?!? Call the Psychiatric Hotline for assistance.
Rebecca Roll: 781-452-2079
Rebecca Roll your friends by having them call 781-452-2079 to hear the viral hit "Friday"
Save the Stars! 603-413-4128
Right now there''s a multi-millionaire NBA basketball player who needs your help. Call 603-413-4128 to pledge your support!
STD Notification Scare: 401-285-0703
You might rethink your sex life after hearing this message from The Midtown Health Clinic at 404-698-2904.
The (Anti) Columbus Day Hotline: 973-409-3471
Call 973-409-3471 to find out why Columbus Day is our most ridiculous national holiday!
The Bad Sex Compensation Line: 401-992-4056
Have you had a disappointing sexual experience? You could be entitled to compensation! Call the law offices of Jones & Adams at ...
The Breakup Bitch (mean): 202-629-9213
Want to break up, but don''t want a confrontation? Let the Breakup Bitch do it for you!
The Breakup Butler (odd): 973-409-3240
Ever needed to end a relationship, but couldn’t find the words yourself? The Breakup Butler knows exactly what to say.
The Original Rejection Hotline®: 212-660-2245
When someone won''t take the hint that you''re not interested or won''t take NO for an answer? Use the Rejection Hotline to get them off your ...
The Vodka Hotline: 772-257-4492
"Take Control, and Lose Control" with The Vodka Hotline at 772-257-4492.
Vietnamese?: 301-917-2204
What? You don''t speak Vietnamese? So you have no idea what this guy is saying? Perfect, because neither do we!
White People 101: 704-970-1827
Don''t panic if you encounter a white person in the wild! Call 704-970-1827 for survival tips.
Worst Phone Sex Line Ever! 781-452-0827
Ever wonder what Borat would sound like as a Sex Hotline operator? Call 781-452-0827 (try all 4 options!) then tell single/desperate friends ...
